February 13, 2021 at Mayer High School in Mayer, AZ
Race Result: DNF
Distance: 52.78 miles (51.2 race course)
Time: 13:33:11
Food: PopTarts and bagel pre-race, several Snickers bars, salted potatoes at every aid station, 1 grilled cheese, 1 quesadilla, 1/2 PBJ sandwich, 2 packs Clif Shotbloks, 2 packs chocolate chip muffins, fruit snacks
Hydration: 100oz water, 20oz Gatorade, 80oz Gu Roctane - flavors: tea, berry, grape, chocolate (protein recovery), 1 shot of Fireball
Gear: UltrAspire Momentum race vest, Hoka Speedgoat 3, Black Diamond Carbon Z trekking poles (planned for last 11 miles but didn't actually use them), GoPro Hero 7 (video), iPhone 11 (photos)
So let's start with my training - as most of you know we live on the road right now, like full time living in a 300sq ft RV with Katie and our 4 kids. After GDR recovery I built out a running plan based on time, and built up my weekly run totals from about 4 hours / 20ish miles to my peak training week of about 10 hrs / 50ish miles. I ran every day for several weeks (at least 15 minutes) but my longest run was only 2.5 hours where I covered 13 miles on a rocky trail. That is what I could justify with our family schedule, because a lot of weekends we are either driving all day to our next campground or going on family adventures. It wasn't a top priority for me to take 4-6+ hours to get in some really long training runs, even though I knew I probably needed that to have a good race. I did feel like the training I did was great as my pace was getting faster and I ran more and more miles. I've heard people say that if you can run 13 miles you can finish a 50k, I was going to put that to the test - and then some - by trying to finish 100k. Was that even possible? Definitely not recommended!
My friend Tony from NC was also running this race and we chatted a bit in the weeks leading up to race day. A big change for this race due to COVID restrictions was that they could only start 30 runners every 15 minutes. Not a big deal, but I was a little bummed my start time wasn't until 10:00am - that meant much less time in daylight. We put in a request to be moved earlier and both got bumped up to 9:00 - hey an extra hour is better than nothing. I was just thankful the race was actually happening after so many had been delayed or canceled, and that the race company was willing to work with the runners and move people around. We didn't really discuss a race plan but I knew Tony would be a lot faster than me. He is a much stronger runner and more experienced at these distances. The longest trail race I've done is 40 miles (once 3 years ago and the GDR DNF in November) so this was a huge jump. I figured I'd hang with him for a while as long as the pace felt easy or we were cruising on the downhill sections.
Race start - socially distanced, masked up, only 30 runners |
Such a beautiful trail |
Running with Tony for 31 miles |
Well stocked aid stations with lots of options, everyone required to mask up while there |
Setting PRs, feeling good still smiling |
Back to the race - disaster struck in mile 33. Not in the normal way like being dehydrated and cramping or lack of energy from not eating. I made a dumb mistake. I watched the very informative pre-race video and read the runners guide and knew the flagging - orange is the course and there will be black and white checkered where you aren't supposed to go. So I'm alone at this point, no runner visible in front of me as we go up and down this windy dirt road. Up ahead on the side of the road I see a trail marker with the black and white checkered flagging wrapped around it and my mind says "don't go that way" - even though "that way" is to continue straight on the road. So I stopped and looked around to see if I missed a turn at which point another runner gets over the hill and we see flagging off to the left. It's pink but who cares, that must be the way to go. SO DUMB. We don't see a trail where those flags are, but looking further down the hill we see one that was actually the continuation of the trail where the wrong way flags indicated we weren't supposed to go. This whole time I had my phone on and could have quickly checked any number of apps and would have seen I should have continued straight. Unfortunately that didn't cross my mind until we were well over a mile off course. The trail dumped us out into a creek bed that was rocky and mucky and overgrown. We bushwhacked around for a while until we saw a trail that went up by someone's backyard, and thought that was actually the trail. When we got out to the road was when I looked at my phone and realized how bad things were - we had to go back down from where we came, follow the creek bed another mile, just to get back on course and have another few miles to the aid station. I was so frustrated at this point, knowing I had done extra mileage and wasted nearly an hour of time. But I was still determined to finish, even if it took 20 hours and I went 65 miles.
When I finally got to Black Canyon City aid mile 39, I needed some time to recover from that terrible experience. I probably took 20 minutes just sitting in a chair, mentally resetting, eating, drinking, chatting with other runners and changing clothes from my drop bag. It was about to get dark and I had been chilly for some time, thanks to the wind and my inability to move fast enough to stay very warm, so it was a good thing I had packed a long sleeve shirt here. The next aid station was 9 miles away and that's when I let the negative thoughts start to creep in. "I'm alone, it's dark, it's cold, it's windy, it's rainy (a tiny bit)" but I pushed them aside and kept moving. I took a few sit down breaks to scarf down some trail snacks and chug some Roctane and every time I did that I felt much better about 10 minutes after. I was to the point that I was only doing some running every other mile. I was pretty excited that I "ran" mile 44 in 15:38 with 130 feet of elevation gain. The miles I was completely hiking were around 18/19. It was somewhere in this section where my legs started to fail me though. I had no ability to pick my legs up off the ground anymore, I had used up all of my strength. My "running" was mostly just a quick shuffle, which resulted in kicking a lot of rocks, several almost trip-and-falls that jolt your whole body, and one really bad rock that I caught with the back of my heel as I stepped over and it flipped up and smacked my Achilles - that one made me yell in pain and still hurts 3 days after the race.
When I finally got to Cottonwood Gulch aid I knew Katie was less than 5 miles away at the only crew access point, so I just filled bottles and left quickly. 2 minute stop. I estimated about 90 minutes to get there and it was right around 9:00pm when I left the aid station. I still thought a sub-17 hour finish could happen as long as I made it out of Table Mesa by 10:40. From there, if I averaged 20 minute miles for the last 11 I could do it. My friends Dave and Julie are always giving me encouragement when I'm on runs like this. They were texting me for a while and I told them there was no quitting this time. I slowly managed my way through to Table Mesa knowing every 18 minute mile gave me a few minutes extra time buffer so I wouldn't have to race the clock. But another thought had been going through my head since the wrong turn - the idea of finishing the race after not doing the proper course felt like cheating. Although I ended up running extra miles, I didn't follow the directions and run the correct route. I struggled with what to do but didn't want to face what I consider to be the right decision - taking a DNF or what really would be a DQ. But my thought was to continue to the finish line and then tell the RD what happened and be gracious with whatever she decided.
None of that would matter though because once I stopped at the crew aid station, a switch flipped and I was DONE. I went from feeling ok on the trail to "I'm sick of being cold and alone in the dark and I just want to go home" in about two seconds. I sat in my chair and Katie used the massage gun on my quads and calves for a bit. Then I laid down to elevate my legs and she helped take off my shoes and put on my leg sleeves while I got on my jacket and gloves. When she went to fill my bottles I should have got back on the chair, because laying on the cold hard ground sucked any warmth away and I got really cold and started shaking from the chills. I went over to the medical tent to warm up by a space heater and wrapped up in a sleeping bag. That felt good but then my right calf locked up and I had a terrible cramp. I decided then that I was for sure done despite Katie doing everything she could to get me to rally and get back out on the trail. She was awesome and I'm so glad she was out there to help me. I just couldn't push the dark thoughts away enough to get back moving. From the comfort of my chair at home three days later, I'm sure if I had just got up and started walking down the trail, I would have been ok. In the moment though, sometimes that's really tough to do.
In the end this goes down as another DNF in a string of some disappointing races that I haven't finished. BFC x3, GDR and now Black Canyon. But there are lots of good takeaways from this one too. The training that I was doing was working, and with a few more months of build up I know I would have finished. This was the most dialed in I have ever been from a fueling standpoint for a race, and I can take that forward to other races. For trail racing, I went further than ever (53 miles) and later into the night (10:30pm) than ever before. That's the hardest part of these things for me - being alone in the dark sucks. I either need to get faster so I finish before sundown, or I need to do more long training runs on the trails at night to get a bit more comfortable. I'm definitely not going to stop doing races like this - I am already signed up for another 100k in October in North Carolina. I feel like each time I'm getting better at different aspects of ultramarathoning, and I'm going to start having some finishes soon!