Beer Mile!

South Wake Beer Mile
October 13, 2018 at Carolina Brewing Company in Holly Springs, NC
Remembering the days of my rock star life
Watch time: 9:06
Chip time: 9:04.33
Position: 31 of 78

Back Story

Our run club likes to run and drink beer.  Pretty self explanatory here haha! But what is a beer mile? For those of you who don't know, it starts with drinking a 12 oz beer and then running a quarter mile, ending back where you started.  You then do this 3 more times for a total of drinking 4 beers and running 1 mile.  There are some rules if you want to be "official", but we aren't trying to break any records here so we did what worked best for our group.

Weeks before race day

I put in loads of training for this race. A few times a week I would go out for a run, and then drink a beer.  Actually though, I did have one run where I took lessons from a guy who ran under 6 minutes - lessons on how to chug a beer quickly. Me and the eventual female champion ran 2 miles, chugged a beer, then 2 more miles, chugged another beer, then did a quarter mile sprint.  And after that, we decided we should drink one more just for good practice - so 3 beers in preparation for a race where we drink 4, kinda like a 20 mile run in preparation for a marathon.

Race Day

Not today!

I really did have a plan. It centered around "don't puke", but I also wanted to go under 10 minutes.  It was only my 2nd time doing a beer mile.  The first time was on Fathers Day in 2017, and my time was around 13 minutes, mostly because I spent around 3 minutes sipping the last beer.  I figured I needed to channel a former lifestyle - before I had 4 kids - and get back to the state of mind of a rock star.  I dug through some old clothes and found my favorite Metallica shirt that I used to wear to gigs - we were an 80s heavy metal cover band.  It seemed like an odd choice to add to the wardrobe of short Nike running shorts and Hokas, but you can't argue with the end results (see finishers photo above!).
The individuals were split into two groups so things weren't so crowded. I watched the first group, mostly in awe of one friend who made his first beer disappear in 1 second.  I slowly drank one beer while they were running, to warm up my stomach for the onslaught it was about to face. I had a lot of fun cheering for everyone, and also joking with them that they looked like they might puke.  A few of them did!

First out of the gate

Shortly after the first group was done, it was go time.  I talked to my drinking coach and he reminded me of our training and the techniques I had learned.  Grabbed my first beer, counted down, and boom! Beer was gone and I was second fastest out of the shoot, but was a faster runner so quickly I was in the lead!  This lasted all of 5 seconds when I realized my morning run had zapped my legs of all running ability.  But it was only a quarter mile, and as we rounded the empty keg at the turnaround point, my friends shouted at me that I wasn't looking like much of a rock star, so I picked up the pace back to the beer.

Drinking is just as important
as the running

Loops two and three were quite similar.  Run under the beer tent out of breath and try to get under control enough to drink.  Three mouthfuls and the beer was down each time as I walked around the table.  Still on good pace, I got halfway to the keg and couldn't get the burp out.  That is one of the keys to a successful beer mile - burping.  So I slowed to a walk until I got a good one, got mocked as only friends know how, and ran back.
Finally, the last beer is where the practice kicked in.  Coach Andy and practice partner Heather were under the tent and yelled at me to remember my training.  I downed that last beer in one go, probably under 3 seconds time.  Got the burp out quickly, and then magically my legs decided to start working.  Either that or I was getting buzzed and didn't notice the soreness any more.  After the turn, did a quick head bang and it was a sprint to the finish and flashing the metal sign as I crossed just over 9 minutes (4 minutes better than last year).

Post Race

More beer, lots of laughs, witnessed a relay team (4 guys drink one beer and run 1/4 mile) run it in 5:04, an elite winning time of 5:37, a great Foo Fighters tribute band, and getting driven home by my wife as I was in no condition to do much of anything.  I swear this is the dumbest race, but I'll probably be back again to go under 9 minutes - or who knows, maybe under 8 with more practice!

Lessons Learned

• Running and drinking is fun! That is all.